Ok, son, SERIOUSLY? 
Last night, at bedtime, he shares the fact that he has signed up for the “show what you know” fair.  It’s like a science fair, for all people, even the non-sciency ones. He’s building a volcano.  This is how it went down.

Him: I signed up for the Show What You Know Fair.
Me:  Cool.  What do you know?
Him: I know how to build a volcano and then make it erupt.
Me: Super cool.  How do you know how to do that.
Him:  The 4H lady came to school…and what she didn’t tell me Google will.
Me: Ok. 
Him:  Here’s the list of stuff that I need.
Me: *taking the list that’s as long as my arm* When do you need to have this stuff?
Him:  Well the fair is on Friday night.
Me: *mouth hanging open* Uh…
Him: *staring back innocently*
Me: When are you going to build said volcano?
Him: I don’t know.  Wednesday or Thursday?
Me: You mean the two days we have two tae kwon do classes, your tae kwon do calisthenics, and baseball practice…not to mention your sister’s dance class and any other homework you might have.
Him:  Yep, I guess so.
Me: *shakes head* *walks away muttering something about being his fathers son*

So…while he’s searching Google for volcano instructions, I’ll be searching for cloning instructions.  If there are two of me and two of him…we stand a chance.

I left work early Friday for a nap before taking the kids to the ball. Because, Mom being sick, is NO excuse to miss the elementary school ball. I learned a lot about my kids that night.

Bug wanted nothing more than to go to the ball. When I asked what she was going to wear, she had it all figured out. She wanted her hair done and her make up done. It was an opportunity to be a princess. She wanted to find her bffs and dance and sing the night away. Bear on the other hand was apprehensive. At school when they’d had “dancing” in gym class, he found it very awkward to dance with a girl. So he couldn’t see what the big deal was. But he said he would go, simply because everyone else was going to be there, also.

What actually happened that night, was awesome. We all dressed up to go. We had to park quite a distance from the school and it was cold and icy. Bear stayed close to me and helped make sure I didn’t slip in my stilettos on the ice. For 11, he was strong, thoughtful and an amazing “date”. Bug, who is typically the whiner, was so excited she barely noticed the cold, icy walk. But did point out any areas of ice she noticed to her brother and I, so that we would be safe. As soon as we walked in the door, we bought them raffle tickets and they raced to show me their artwork that was hanging on the wall. I asked them if we could please get a family picture taken…and they happily agreed. They helped each other find their friends. They checked in with me frequently to make sure that I knew where they were and who they were with. They were happy, respectful and most importantly….they were kids. It was such a joy to watch them just be in their element. There aren’t a lot of opportunities to watch them interact with their peers, their teachers and other adults, but I soaked up every moment of this one.

We chatted excitedly all the way home. We all got directly into our jammies and I told them that they could come hang out in my bed, to read, if they wanted, but that due to my illness, it was time for me to go to bed. My son came in about 10 minutes later, with a glass of water for me, and he pulled the covers up around me and then sang this……

“Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr purr purr.”

If you don’t watch Big Bang Theory, it won’t make any sense. But if you do, you know it was the sweetest, most loving moment an 11 year old boy can muster for his sick mom. And one, in all my years, I’ll never forget.

Wordless Wednesday

February 18, 2010


*Note: This was taken with a phone, at night, in low light. Photographically it sucks…but these are my loves and I love this picture despite that.

My Bear is 11

February 5, 2010
Dear Bear,

Wow…Eleven years ago today you were born. It was one of the happiest days of my life. I was scared and anxious as we left for the hospital. We would be coming home as three. When you were born, there were dozens of people that came to meet you. Everyone was SO excited. You were a sweet baby. You didn’t want to sleep much, heck you don’t now, but not sleeping didn’t make you too crabby. You were spoiled by everyone. You didn’t like napping much, but you loved snuggling. So if I would hold you during the day, you could snooze for hours. You were so spoiled. Even once I returned to work, your babysitter would hold you every day for your afternoon nap. I think it’s because you were so snuggly. It was relaxing to just sit and hold you.

You have always been smart. You started walking early, Halloween night, as a matter of fact. You were just about 9 months old. You took off walking across a hardwood floor…in only your stocking feet, which no one would have suspected to be a problem because YOU WERE NOT EVEN 9 MONTHS OLD. Five steps in and you were on your butt. And because you were so smart, you chose NOT to walk for almost another month. Then one day, in the middle of the fabric store, you just walked clear across the store. Fort Morgan was such a small town that everyone in the store knew you and cheered for you. You were so proud of yourself, as was I. You also spoke very early. At 8 months old you could say dog, sock, mama and dada. By 9 months nothing was off limits…including dammit, which I’m proud to report you used in the right context when pushing the water dispense button on the fridge and getting soaked. By the age of 2 you had a US puzzle that you could name almost every state and could put together in no time at all.

Because you are so naturally smart, school subjects have always been easy for you. Sitting in class, actively participating, and not goofing around however…have not been easy. Every year at conferences your dad and I know exactly what we will hear. He’s so bright, but what a pain in the butt. (That’s not what they say EXACTLY, but that’s what we hear.) You love to read, you love computers, you love your HAL subjects….as long as you can do them on your time. It may very well be a life long battle for you. But, I know, no matter where your decisions take you, you will be successful.

You have the biggest heart. You care about people. As a small child, you were often cognisant of how others must be feeling. You are still very empathetic, to everyone…except your sister. You give the most remarkable hugs. When you see someone struggling with their emotions, you do what you can to help them be happy or feel better. I hope you continue to develop this skill as you get older, it’s very important and not everyone can do this. You do it very well.

And now for the fun….you’re hilarious. I mean, roll on the floor laughing, hilarious. I love that about you. You’re humor is directly related to your brilliance. You see things in a way that often others don’t. You say things that make people think. Everyone notices your smile, your sense of humor and your adult wit.

On your birthday, I want you to know what I want for you in your life. I want you to learn to work hard for what you want. I hope that you understand that you can have all the things you’re looking for, IF you’re willing to work for them. The world doesn’t hand you much…you have to make things happen for yourself. I want you to find something that makes you truly happy. I want you to pursue your passions, find a way to make those your livelihood. You can do anything you put your mind to so find a way to do something you love. I want you to find a way to value the opinions, directions and wisdom of your elders. Learning from others mistakes can make life a little less painful. Embrace life, have fun, be responsible and accountable and most of all…FIND A GOOD NURSING HOME FOR YOUR DEAR OLD MOM WHEN SHE FINALLY CRACKS.

I love you, son. You are my pride and joy. Watching you grow up has been one of the most rewarding things I’ve EVER done. I know in my heart that you will grow up to be a strong man, with a big heart and a true passion for life. Don’t let anything hold you back. You decide your future. You have the heart, drive and passion within you to make all your dreams come true.
I love you,
Mom.

Wordless Wednesday

February 4, 2010

Almost. It took MONTHS, but it’s finally fallen out…

Introducing Bear-isms

February 1, 2010

Bearisms: The obnoxious, yet hilarious things my son says that probably should get him in trouble, but its hard to punish him when you can’t keep a straight face. These types of comments happen frequently…it seems appropriate to now start documenting. Because, yeah, they’re that good.

After finding out that a mutual friend had recently found a girlfriend online (and the details behind how these dating sites work) AND the unfortunate timing of the knowledge that this new gal and her family like “Hebrew National” hotdogs (same as they love), he responded with “Was that one of the 29 compatibility points or what?” I think he’s really got a handle on this internet dating thing.

Oh son…your sarcasm will get you far in life, unless it gets you beat up or thrown in jail. Only time will tell.

I’m coming back

January 21, 2010

I suppose any of you who stumble by have wondered if I’ve fallen off the face of the earth. I haven’t. It’s been a rough go lately, but I am working on finding my new normal. I had a hysterectomy at the end of December and lost one of my dearest friends to a totally senseless death on January 9th. But, each day I have worked to find myself again. I miss appreciating my kids and finding the joy in our lives…so the good news is…I’ll be back. The bad news is…it won’t be today. New blog post about kids and joy…coming soon!

My sister and I got our kids together at Mama and Papa’s house this past weekend, in hopes of getting the perfect Christmas Card photo…I’ll let the results speak for themselves.


Needless to say, I want a new camera for Christmas…and also, I’ll be taking more photos this weekend.

The perfect stage ……………………………………………………………………………$11

Feather Boas and ROCKSTAR wigs (post Halloween Sale)……………………………………………………$20

Glow sticks and a dark basement ……………………………………………………………….$6

Having your daughter pass out on the couch at noon after proclaiming, “That was the best birthday party EVER!”……………………………………………………..PRICELESS

Happy Birthday Baby Girl

November 19, 2009

I spent the early morning hours remembering what it was like the day you were born. You were a week overdue and I went in on Monday afternoon for a Non-Stress Test. You were beautiful during the ultrasound, but my amniotic fluid was WAY TOO LOW. We were told to go straight to the hospital. I called Diana so that Bear could spend the night with her and Olivia. Then, I called Aunt Amanda, because she REALLY wanted to be here for your birth. She started the 5 hour drive just as quickly as she could. Your dad, Amanda and I walked the walls of the hospital for hours, trying to convince you that you wanted to come out. I was so excited to see you that sometimes, the walk was really more of a sprint. It was a fun time. By 2 am there was just not enough progress and so we scheduled a C-Section for 6 am the next morning. You were born at 6:19 am…and you were BEAUTIFUL.
You’ve been a joy to watch grow. You never cried as a baby, you had this grunting noise that you would make when you were hungry…and the rest of the time, you were content just to be cute. Also, you might find it hard to believe, but when you were born, your brother loved you SO much. He helped me do everything for you, even change diapers. He wanted to take you with him to preschool every day. It was a beautiful time for all of us.
And now, you’re a bright glowing little girl. Your smile lights up a room. There is nothing more lovely to me than the sound of your giggle. You are very smart. I love to watch you read and do your homework. Your personality is completely engaging. When you are in a good mood and goofy, it’s nearly impossible for anyone around you to feel anything but joy. When you’re in a bad mood….WATCH OUT!
You have certainly developed your own sense of style. I love the different hats you wear, or the decisive effort you put into choosing the “perfect” scarf with your outfit. Ever since you were a toddler, you’ve had a thing for shoes. A trip to Target at that age almost ALWAYS resulted in a trip through the shoe department and a young Bug saying “please, mama” (in fact, you may have signed “Please” before you were able to speak, when you saw the shoes you wanted.) You love shoes. I love watching that you become more confident about the things that you want to wear and do. I can’t wait to see how that continues to change as you get older.
As you continue to grow, I want you to remember a few things. You are very smart. You make excellent decisions. Trust yourself. Always do what’s best for you. The rest of the world will love it or leave it. You are beautiful, just the way you are. Your beauty comes from within. The color of your hair, the size of your clothes, or the labels that you wear, do not make you beautiful or who you are. It’s the light in your eyes, the smile on your face, and the joy in your heart that make you beautiful. Don’t ever forget that. Lastly, find things that make you happy and do them every day. I can see the joy you have when you’re in dance class. I love that you do that. As you grow up, always find something that makes you that happy and make it a priority. It will make you better at every other thing you do.
Happy Birthday, Bug. You’re such a special little girl. You’re growing way too fast. I love you with all of my heart. I hope SEVEN is good to you!
Love, Mom